"I Feel Like I Need to Start Over"

The past few days have been hard. Much to do, many demands, bills, whiny kids, homeschool lessons to plan, fear that I am not an adequate teacher, "will they learn what they need to know?", the heat, bills, that kitchen that still sits half painted, dentists appointments, sewing, confrontation, hurried days busy schedules.....throw in a messy house, potty training 2 year old and an overflowing garden desperately needed to be canned, and you are left with one tired momma! How is it, that life can be rolling along so beautifully....and all of a sudden I find myself so worn. Now, don't get me wrong, the past few days have been good. But little occurrences have left my heart tired, confused and at moments...frustrated. I know the kind of home and life I want to provide for my husband and children: A happy, gentle momma, a home full of peace and love, rooms bursting with the grace and mercy of the Lord. Homeschooling lessons full of laughter, healthy meals around a smiling table, Saturdays in the garden working together as a family, afternoons spent sewing to fund adoptions, children to find a refuge in our family, a joy filled home for my hard working husband to come home to. Oh, and I want the house to be clean....sparkling, perfectly organized. I envision evenings around the fire reading missionary biographies aloud to the kids, trips to the grocery store with a coupon for every item, handmade quilts on each bed and smocked dresses on every little girl. A simple, plain house.....full of laughter and love. I long for perfection. The past few days have reminded me that we live in a fallen world...there will be no perfection this side of Heaven. I can work, strive, fight, pray, beg and exhaust myself......but the Thomas Kincaid image of home I am struggling to achieve....will. not.be.

Landis has had a tough day. A tired little boy, in desperate need of a long nap...morphed into quite the hand full by lunchtime. A trashing heap on the floor....he finally calmed, and looked up at my through red, puffy eyes. "Momma." He said, "I feel like I just need to start over again." Oh, the honest plea from his little heart. I know how he feels...I too feel like I just need to start over again.

What a gracious, tender, patient God we serve...who gives us not only the privilege, but the strength itself to "just start over again." And He pleads to us, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." (Matt. 11:28) In Him, in His Word I will find the rest and stillness of heart I so desire.

Life is busy....but I need not fill it up with more. Each day will hold whiny kids, hurts, frustrations, appointments and demands....and that is ok. I do not have to mop after each meal, keep the windows fee of all precious little fingerprints, have the smartest kids on the block or coupon like a pro. I do not need to sell a million dress, read 50 blogs, can 5 bushels of pickles, smock all of Evangeline's clothes or grind every grain of wheat we eat. I must quit doing and start trusting in his grace and His provision. Oh, how my days might look if I rose each morning, lifted my hands to heaven and cried out, "The day is yours.....how then should I fill it! And may I rest in Your strength and not my own to carry these short hours here on earth out!"

I am thankful for these hard, but good days when the Lord stops me, brings me back and reminds me to slow down and rest in Him. He has placed one wonderful husband and 3 precious children in my care, and He will bring more according to His timing and when He sees fit. Nothing I can do will speed that process up, and Hallelujah that He knows best!

So I will "just start this day over", only not trusting in my own strength, but His grace. I will do the best with the energy, time and ability He gives me, and be content to let the rest....rest. May I sew, but know that He is the great provider, may I cook, but remember that He is the one who nourishes souls, may I clean..yet remember that this world is not my home. May I rest in Him!

My wonderful husband and sweet kids....who are happy to have just me, a not a perfectly clean house!:)

A Few Changes are Coming!!!

They are coming...

A revised Flitterbug Dress,

New styles for older girls,

A fun, revised skirt pattern,

and

Matching mother-daughter aprons!

Check back later next week to see the new styles....

Flitterbugs Giveaway!!!!

Head on over to Flitterbugs on Facebook....click on "like" and enter to win any Flitterbugs of your choice!

You can enter up to 2 times....winner to be chosen on Monday.

(And while you are there....how about invite your friends to follow Flitterbugs on Facebook:)

How Beautiful

Several years ago, I sat in my college dorm and read a World magazine article about a family whom had followed the call to adopt. I had know I wanted to adopt children since I was very young, but this was the first time I had actually heard about a family who had adopted many children from all over the world. I kept the article, reading it over and over. I was particularly moved by the fact that when given the choice of adopting another sibling or having a pool put in the backyard, the Faske kids all chose to adopt again. How beautiful! A couple of weeks ago, I received a dress order from a family who has 3 bio kids and 18 adopted......could this be the family who years ago so touched my heart towards adoption? Yes, theses little girls I am sewing for are the very ones who came home (instead of a swimming pool!) I could never have imagined, years ago reading a magazine article, that one day, this very family would help to bring our own child home.

And my heart cries, "How beautiful!"

Weeks ago, I received an email from a family. They are in the process of adopting a little girl from Ethiopia, and these 3 children waiting for their little sister, want to help bring other children home as well. Could they go door to door in their neighborhood and sell Africa shaped cookies to help with our adoption fundraising? My children and I were blown away by the generosity and love of these strangers...now friends. Out in a hot Georgia day these little ones and their momma went, knocking on doors, advocating for the orphan......and can you imagine our delight when a $100 check arrived days later? Children caring about the least of these in the World, Mommas who desire to raise their children for Christ, strangers becoming friends on a common journey....

And my heart cries, "How beautiful!"

We have not yet received that long awaited call. We do not have our little one in our arms. We have not yet signed those much wanted papers. We have not yet had the privilege of praying for our birthmother by name......but already, I am changed. I knew the adoption journey would impact me, but I did not realize it would so dynamically change me.....transform me in areas that do not even seem to pertain to adoption. Callouses have been removed from my heart, and I do not ever want to go back....to return to "normal". I find myself more thankful than ever for my family. I find myself more in love with my husband, more in love with my kids. I am more gentle and caring to the stranger. I want to talk to the disgruntled cashier....to in some small way share with them the love of my Savior. I see Christ in others. I am not in such a rush....there are people to love, and I want to love them. I am a bit more patient, a bit more kind, a bit more peaceful. I hurt for young momma sitting out in the heat at a bus stop with her kids. I appreciate the short conversations I have with the older man with Down Syndrome bagging my groceries. I want to see lives changed, to see hurts healed, to see the work of the great physician in a life. I want to love children...to really love them and invest my whole heart in them. Adoption has changed me...it is growing in me a love for each "fearfully and wonderfully made" individual I come into contact with. And if loving and caring for those made in the image of God comes at a price to me...then so be it! To Him be the Glory, both now and forevermore!

And my heart cries...."HOW BEAUTIFUL!"

New Fabrics!

Lots of new fabrics are in...with more to come.

Fall colors, back to school, purples, browns, polka dots and more will be coming soon for the fall!

Go HERE to see this weeks new fabric arrivals.

$18 SALE!!! Ready to Ship!!!

I made up a big batch of the new "Katie" style Flitterbug....

the dresses are new and ready to ship..($3 shipping)

just $18 each!!

Just email me of you would like to buy one, first come first serve.

(The size of the Dress is on the picture, plus description below)

Size 1:Cupcakes-SOLD!

Size 2: Flower Crystals-SOLD

Size 3: Lily Pond-SOLD

Size 3: Lime Dots

Size 4: Plain Jane-SOLD!

Size 5: Ditzy Dots-SOLD

Size 5-China Dolls-SOLD

Size 6: Spring Flowers

***** Remember, thru Saturday you can order any "Katie" dress or top for just $20. See post below for more info!

"Katie" Dress Sale!

Would you like to try out the new "Katie" style Dress or Top?

June 1 through June 5 .....

order any "Katie" Dress or top for just $20!

The dress comes in size 6 month to size 10...the top in size 6 month to size 14.

Go HERE to see more pictures and info on the new "Katie" Dress....and HERE to see some yummy new fabrics that have come in!